revisiting melody...

if i like a song, i mean really, really like a song, i listen to it over and over again.
10 times, a 100 times, a 1000 times.
until i know every word, every nuance and understand every meaning of the lyrics.
it may sound crazy and obsessive but i just feel more connected to the song.
and as strange as it may sound, i ALWAYS remember the feeling of hearing that song for the first time.

someone just reminded me of one of my favorite songs from almost a lifetime ago.
the film was 'daddy'.
the song was 'aaina mujhse meri pehli si soorat maange' (the mirror asks me to be the same ol' person i once was..)
a drunk, haggard looking Anupam Kher's character, a well known singer singing after years on stage.
but really, asking for his daughter's forgiveness for everything that went wrong in her life, because of him.

i remember i was very young then. very serious. everything bothered me.
i remember lying on the floor listening to it, rewinding the cassette again and again to that song.
i remember it was a very small, dark, hot room.
i remember the water cooler trying to cool the room. we didn't have an air-conditioner then.
i remember drinking 'aam panna' (mango drink with mint leaves). ice clinking in the glass.
i remember feeling the melancholy of the song.

after many many years, just listened to it again on my laptop.
im not so young anymore. wiser now, to not let anything affect me much.
lying on my comfortable futon, the laptop set on replay mode to that song.
its a really big room, bright sunlight streaming into it, cool breeze making it almost romantic.
the drink has changed.

only the melancholy remains the same.





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